3.2km today.
today's run gave me time to think:
we each have our own burdens to carry,
and mine will only become more and more difficult to bear.
but i'll survive, because i have to.
no matter what comes my way,
be it criticism or obstacles,
i will come out stronger and more determined.
and though i may have to walk this path alone,
i know i will eventually make it okay.
life is a never ending run.
destination: unknown.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Saturday, February 25, 2012
too good to be true.
if i'm dreaming, i hope i never wake up.
i hope it always stays this way, i hope that it'll get even better.
whatever i did to deserve this, i honestly hope it'll last.
i'm thankful for all that i have now,
but i can't help but wonder: can this be too good to be true?
and yet while i'm happy that something's going right, i still can't shake that feeling of my unspoken friend. mixed feelings to the max.
i hope it always stays this way, i hope that it'll get even better.
whatever i did to deserve this, i honestly hope it'll last.
i'm thankful for all that i have now,
but i can't help but wonder: can this be too good to be true?
and yet while i'm happy that something's going right, i still can't shake that feeling of my unspoken friend. mixed feelings to the max.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
can't we go back?
the times where you stare at your phone and wonder why that familiar number doesn't appear, the times where you remember the laughs that you onced shared. the times when you find a letter in a corner of your room, read it again and feel all your emotions rushing back to you. the times where you wonder and wonder: can't we go back?
1 month and 22 days. time sure passes by quickly, and the once empty feeling i felt at the beginning is slowly becoming permanent. i once promised myself that till the end i would keep and protect this friendship at all costs, but things are getting blurry.
i thought time would help settle things. that when the time was right, we would go back to the way we were, but the more time passes the harder it is for me to believe that i haven't been forgotten. life goes on for everyone, no one questions why we're not talking, no one asks how i feel about this. but if they did, i would tell them: something's not right, a huge part is missing.
i now realise that the easiest things, are sometimes also the hardest thing. saying hello used to be so easy. yet right now, i don't even know if i should approach you or how you'll react to me. it isn't suppose to be that hard.
i don't know what's going to happen from here on, but i really need you to know this: no matter what your thoughts are towards us, or if you've figured out how you wanna go from here, at least know that i really miss you and how we used to be.
1 month and 22 days. time sure passes by quickly, and the once empty feeling i felt at the beginning is slowly becoming permanent. i once promised myself that till the end i would keep and protect this friendship at all costs, but things are getting blurry.
i thought time would help settle things. that when the time was right, we would go back to the way we were, but the more time passes the harder it is for me to believe that i haven't been forgotten. life goes on for everyone, no one questions why we're not talking, no one asks how i feel about this. but if they did, i would tell them: something's not right, a huge part is missing.
i now realise that the easiest things, are sometimes also the hardest thing. saying hello used to be so easy. yet right now, i don't even know if i should approach you or how you'll react to me. it isn't suppose to be that hard.
i don't know what's going to happen from here on, but i really need you to know this: no matter what your thoughts are towards us, or if you've figured out how you wanna go from here, at least know that i really miss you and how we used to be.
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
hello new choir ppl.
CHOIR BONDING SESSION TODAY: 5 -9 pm. O.o
basically running around the school with games, getting to know the new J1 choir ppl (ALOT OF BOYS THIS YEAR) and messing around with the j2s. (:
had a friendly frizbee match with tingyu, bertrand, nicole and ruth today before the bonding actually started. i think it's school stress, we were ridiculously high and really good at playing frizbee. haha! blowing balloons for decorations and cam-whoring, piano playing, singing at the top of our voices are on the top of our list too.
that said, i had 2 hours plus of extra econs tutorial today after my normal timetable. 2.30 - 4.35pm BRAIN DEAD MAX. cause i really paid attention during the whole 2 hours plus while jie ying was dying beside me and nette was just messing around with jessica and being funny as usual.(: love those girls.
oh, and of course, i had my first pe lesson today. OMG! 1st pe lesson in 5 months, no wonder i've been feeling so horrible at the thought of running! still, our new pe teacher was nice enough to let us off with light running and slacked warm down session. thurs shall not be that easy though according to her.
hearing that is so not comforting. PLUS, i'm in competitive roadrace, how will i survive?! looks like it's off to the gym and track 3 times a week for the next 3 weeks! roadrace on the 3rd of march. '' I WILL RUN 3.3KM AND DO DAMN WELL IN IT!! '' in my heart i'm really thinking: god, pls let me survive this.
basically running around the school with games, getting to know the new J1 choir ppl (ALOT OF BOYS THIS YEAR) and messing around with the j2s. (:
had a friendly frizbee match with tingyu, bertrand, nicole and ruth today before the bonding actually started. i think it's school stress, we were ridiculously high and really good at playing frizbee. haha! blowing balloons for decorations and cam-whoring, piano playing, singing at the top of our voices are on the top of our list too.
that said, i had 2 hours plus of extra econs tutorial today after my normal timetable. 2.30 - 4.35pm BRAIN DEAD MAX. cause i really paid attention during the whole 2 hours plus while jie ying was dying beside me and nette was just messing around with jessica and being funny as usual.(: love those girls.
oh, and of course, i had my first pe lesson today. OMG! 1st pe lesson in 5 months, no wonder i've been feeling so horrible at the thought of running! still, our new pe teacher was nice enough to let us off with light running and slacked warm down session. thurs shall not be that easy though according to her.
hearing that is so not comforting. PLUS, i'm in competitive roadrace, how will i survive?! looks like it's off to the gym and track 3 times a week for the next 3 weeks! roadrace on the 3rd of march. '' I WILL RUN 3.3KM AND DO DAMN WELL IN IT!! '' in my heart i'm really thinking: god, pls let me survive this.
Friday, February 17, 2012
a late valentine's.
i got a small surprise today. i opened my mailbox, and saw a letter from one of my closest friends. (: the moment i saw her hand writing it knew it was her, just that i didn't think that i could still recognise her writing cause we haven't been classmates for so long.
heh, i got a little teary reading the letter, cause it's quite unlike her to be so open about her feelings cause she's really quiet and shy, i.e SHE'S MY TOTAL OPPOSITE. HAHA! but, as different as we are, we're still best friends and i'm glad that she's the one who went through so much with me.
so to this dear friend of mine: i shall forever remember you for who you are and what you mean to me (: you are special in every way and btw, NO ONE TALKS ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE IN THEIR VALENTINE'S LOVE LETTERS. HAHAHAHA!
on another note, i forgot to thank the people who gave me valentine's day stuff. be it small or big, thanks so much for the thought (:
heh, i got a little teary reading the letter, cause it's quite unlike her to be so open about her feelings cause she's really quiet and shy, i.e SHE'S MY TOTAL OPPOSITE. HAHA! but, as different as we are, we're still best friends and i'm glad that she's the one who went through so much with me.
so to this dear friend of mine: i shall forever remember you for who you are and what you mean to me (: you are special in every way and btw, NO ONE TALKS ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE IN THEIR VALENTINE'S LOVE LETTERS. HAHAHAHA!
 |
| <3 03.01.12 |
on another note, i forgot to thank the people who gave me valentine's day stuff. be it small or big, thanks so much for the thought (:
 |
| my valentine's stash after i ate 1/4 of it. >.< still, to anyone who gave me smthing or wished me a happy valentines, THANK YOU (: |
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Valentine's 2012.
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY EVERYONE! (:
it's that time of the year again, where the day is just dedicated to lovers everywhere and anywhere. but for people like me, well, it's good to be single. haha! it's more like friendship day. and like every other valentines' i prepared stuff for my classmates. this year though, i have 44 classmates to make stuff for, so needless to say, i didn't get much sleep last night cause i was preparing stuff!
still, today was really special, cause....
I HAD MY FIRST VALENTINE'S DATE! (:
with....
the hospital doctor at SGH -.-
as well as some very amazing single ladies. haha! (:
i hope you weren't expecting me to say that i went on a date with some super cute guy. cause well, it ain't happening any time soon. still, today was my first ever valentine's date so it's really special. then again, i guess you could consider it 2 dates respectively. LOL.
the checkup at the SGH took up half my day today.... and i had to wait for 4 hours before i could see the doctor, but the good news is that my eye is healing fine! just that i still need about 3 - 4 more weeks for the blurry vision to go away and to see clearly again, but i still can't wear contacts for the next 1 month ): oh well, i shall just continue to look studious for however long it takes for me to recover.
then i met the girls for dinner at ehub. it's the first dinner outing we've had together in a long time cause they're busy with j2 work and i've started with school and all that. nonetheless, i'm happy to say that it was the shortest yet BESTEST VALENTINE'S DATE EVER. hahaha! just catching with them and talking about all the standard girl topics made me feel like i've never left them.
i suppose every year's valentine's day just reminds me that you can happy and have fun even if you're single and that sometimes, having good friends like these is really more than enough. (: STILL, to those who are attatched, i hope you're happy in love, and that the special bond that you two share will always be smthing that you cherish. afterall, being in love is a really amazing feeling. (like i always say: me = hopeless romantic. hahahaha!)
on a related topic, i learnt from my lit teacher today:
FA = FOREVER AVAILABLE. and not forever alone. HAHAHA!
so to all my single guy friends who are sad about being FA right now, don't be. cause you're AVAILABLE. lol.
and though i still miss the tkgs version of valentine's like crazy, this valentine's has it's own special meaning in my heart (:
it's that time of the year again, where the day is just dedicated to lovers everywhere and anywhere. but for people like me, well, it's good to be single. haha! it's more like friendship day. and like every other valentines' i prepared stuff for my classmates. this year though, i have 44 classmates to make stuff for, so needless to say, i didn't get much sleep last night cause i was preparing stuff!
still, today was really special, cause....
I HAD MY FIRST VALENTINE'S DATE! (:
with....
the hospital doctor at SGH -.-
as well as some very amazing single ladies. haha! (:
i hope you weren't expecting me to say that i went on a date with some super cute guy. cause well, it ain't happening any time soon. still, today was my first ever valentine's date so it's really special. then again, i guess you could consider it 2 dates respectively. LOL.
the checkup at the SGH took up half my day today.... and i had to wait for 4 hours before i could see the doctor, but the good news is that my eye is healing fine! just that i still need about 3 - 4 more weeks for the blurry vision to go away and to see clearly again, but i still can't wear contacts for the next 1 month ): oh well, i shall just continue to look studious for however long it takes for me to recover.
then i met the girls for dinner at ehub. it's the first dinner outing we've had together in a long time cause they're busy with j2 work and i've started with school and all that. nonetheless, i'm happy to say that it was the shortest yet BESTEST VALENTINE'S DATE EVER. hahaha! just catching with them and talking about all the standard girl topics made me feel like i've never left them.
 |
| <3 - 14.02.12 |
i suppose every year's valentine's day just reminds me that you can happy and have fun even if you're single and that sometimes, having good friends like these is really more than enough. (: STILL, to those who are attatched, i hope you're happy in love, and that the special bond that you two share will always be smthing that you cherish. afterall, being in love is a really amazing feeling. (like i always say: me = hopeless romantic. hahahaha!)
on a related topic, i learnt from my lit teacher today:
FA = FOREVER AVAILABLE. and not forever alone. HAHAHA!
so to all my single guy friends who are sad about being FA right now, don't be. cause you're AVAILABLE. lol.
and though i still miss the tkgs version of valentine's like crazy, this valentine's has it's own special meaning in my heart (:
Monday, February 13, 2012
GRRR.
valentines day eve.
and as i've been all my life so far, i'm still single this year. (: i'm not complaining though, cause it's pretty fun. tomorrow's just a chance for me to celebrate singlehood and friendship! haha! but we'll talk about that tomorrow.
heh. official school day 1 for me, because i've been going on mc for so long thanks to my eye infection. going back to lectures is honestly a little un-nerving. nonetheless, it's nice to be studying again. (I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST SAID THAT...) what i realise after 4 long lectures today: the work we're doing this year is surprisingly different from that of last year, more so for math and chem and lit. O.o
there aren't huge changes, just enough to make me doubt a little what i've been studying myself for the past 3 months... heh. oh well, a very wise friend told me it's all about finding my own pace and that i'll be fine as long as i find that pace. so, i honestly hope he's right.
still, it's really quite frustrating when you see others getting it so right the first time while you're still only doing average on your second try. GRRR. I SHALL NOT GIVE UP. i will do well this year, and i'll get to where i wanna go.
at least this time round, i know what i want and i'll do what it takes to get there.
and as i've been all my life so far, i'm still single this year. (: i'm not complaining though, cause it's pretty fun. tomorrow's just a chance for me to celebrate singlehood and friendship! haha! but we'll talk about that tomorrow.
heh. official school day 1 for me, because i've been going on mc for so long thanks to my eye infection. going back to lectures is honestly a little un-nerving. nonetheless, it's nice to be studying again. (I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST SAID THAT...) what i realise after 4 long lectures today: the work we're doing this year is surprisingly different from that of last year, more so for math and chem and lit. O.o
there aren't huge changes, just enough to make me doubt a little what i've been studying myself for the past 3 months... heh. oh well, a very wise friend told me it's all about finding my own pace and that i'll be fine as long as i find that pace. so, i honestly hope he's right.
still, it's really quite frustrating when you see others getting it so right the first time while you're still only doing average on your second try. GRRR. I SHALL NOT GIVE UP. i will do well this year, and i'll get to where i wanna go.
at least this time round, i know what i want and i'll do what it takes to get there.
Friday, February 10, 2012
complications.
things just get messed up sometimes.
even when you don't mean for it to, even when you don't expect it to.
and at times try as you might,
you can't undo any damage you've done, whether anot you've ment it.
this is why i've always tried to be careful,
especially when it came to this.
guess i can still mess things up afterall.
then again, maybe its humans' nature to err.
it's in our blood, and so it is bound to happen.
still, i had hoped i would never make an error like this though.
yet, i'm not terribly upset.
and that's the change, that's the thing that's different now.
i'm sorry if i've hurt you,
but it's time to stop fighting logic and reason.
and i'm ready to finally admit what i knew from long ago.
truth is, we will never be right for each other.
even when you don't mean for it to, even when you don't expect it to.
and at times try as you might,
you can't undo any damage you've done, whether anot you've ment it.
this is why i've always tried to be careful,
especially when it came to this.
guess i can still mess things up afterall.
then again, maybe its humans' nature to err.
it's in our blood, and so it is bound to happen.
still, i had hoped i would never make an error like this though.
yet, i'm not terribly upset.
and that's the change, that's the thing that's different now.
i'm sorry if i've hurt you,
but it's time to stop fighting logic and reason.
and i'm ready to finally admit what i knew from long ago.
truth is, we will never be right for each other.
Sunday, February 5, 2012
18.
i hear that that's the number of people in my class this year. with 17 of us being girls and erm well, 1 guy. haha! i honestly hope he doesn't mind being in touch with his feminine side for the next 2 years, and i also hope for his sake that some other guys decide to appeal into our class. lol.
hmm, maybe cause i've finally gotten used to the 10 seriously funny, occasionally gay and somewhat annoying yet amusing all at the same time guys of 11s417, that now that i've found out that i only have 1 guy in the class, it's a little awkward and weird. O.o i'm in atlas again this year, at least that's good news (: though my class count has reduced by 1/2 >.<
that being said, i guess it'll be a little like going back to tkg with it being almost all girls and stuff. (: so i'm looking forward to all the crazy stuff that only girls are capable of! hopefully we'll have just as much fun. hmm, unfortunately, both jordan and genie are not in my class so that means i'm going to be a little like a lone warrior tomorrow. i'm sure i'll be fine though. as for genie and jordan, they've streamed into the same class this year, so that's good for them. according to genie, they have a class count of 20, with a 1:1 ratio of guys is to girls, sounds fair enough (:
heh, my nervousness is kinda coming back to me again. hahaha. i'm just hoping the class girls will be nice and easy to get along with. the whole 'smaller class and 1 guy only' thing is somthing that i'll soon adjust to (: well now, i'm off to meet my new class tomorrow, with a still slightly swollen and red left eye. heh. here's hoping i don't scare them away (:
hmm, maybe cause i've finally gotten used to the 10 seriously funny, occasionally gay and somewhat annoying yet amusing all at the same time guys of 11s417, that now that i've found out that i only have 1 guy in the class, it's a little awkward and weird. O.o i'm in atlas again this year, at least that's good news (: though my class count has reduced by 1/2 >.<
that being said, i guess it'll be a little like going back to tkg with it being almost all girls and stuff. (: so i'm looking forward to all the crazy stuff that only girls are capable of! hopefully we'll have just as much fun. hmm, unfortunately, both jordan and genie are not in my class so that means i'm going to be a little like a lone warrior tomorrow. i'm sure i'll be fine though. as for genie and jordan, they've streamed into the same class this year, so that's good for them. according to genie, they have a class count of 20, with a 1:1 ratio of guys is to girls, sounds fair enough (:
heh, my nervousness is kinda coming back to me again. hahaha. i'm just hoping the class girls will be nice and easy to get along with. the whole 'smaller class and 1 guy only' thing is somthing that i'll soon adjust to (: well now, i'm off to meet my new class tomorrow, with a still slightly swollen and red left eye. heh. here's hoping i don't scare them away (:
Saturday, February 4, 2012
the one that got away.
this song is stuck in my head.
hmm. i've been hearing alot about friendzoning lately, mainly from the guys. i wonder if it's because valentines' day is coming, so everyone is on the topic of being single/it's complicated/taken and other options.
well, suppose some of the guys feel that they get friendzone alot, and they are now even vying for the tittle of friendzone king. lol. actually i think the girls get our fair share of getting friendzoned too, just that we tell our girl friends more than we tell our guy friends. so maybe that's why guys say they have it worse when it comes to friendzoning?
still, i personally feel that there's nothing wrong with being single and happy, or liking someone but not being with that person. i guess i feel that i can be happy without necessarily being with the one i like, as long as he's happy and i can be by his side i suppose it's fine with me too. (: but maybe i might change my mind after sometime, whose to know. haha.
that being said, i hope my guy friends aren't too upset about being friendzoned. i guess i honestly believe that there will be a girl ment for them (okay, i admit i can be a hopeless romantic at times, so i believe in stuff like that...)
on another note, my left eye is now completely and utterly swollen and red. i went from having double eyelid to having a single eyelid now ): and i keep tearing. sigh. i hope a miracle happens and i get well enough to go to school on monday. i don't wanna miss orientation ):
Thursday, February 2, 2012
1020.
i just saw today that i have 1020 pageviews for my blog. i'm honestly really surprised cause i've only been blogging for about 3 months plus. so to all the people who take the time to read my blog: thanks. (:
okay, that aside, today was the last day of AG. tomorrow is a day off thanks to miss lai, or mainly because there is too many days for orientation and not enough activities to span through the days. well subject combi results came out today and i got into the combi that i wanted, so i guess that's good news.
ah, the new J1 batch is... interesting. hahaha. a variety of different people i would say. big and small, but really more small. the girls this year are mostly really quite pettie and so are about 1/2 the guys? well, compared to me that is. i realised that i'm actually taller than around 1/4 to 1/2 the guys in the cohort this year. oh goodness, there goes my hopes of blending in with them. lol.
so first day of AG was just pin drop slience, cause everyone was new to school and new to each other. i tried talking to a girl but got weird looks and an icy-cold attitude from her instead. so after 5 attempts to make friends with her, i kinda just gave up and was slightly down for the rest of the day... day 2 was better though cause there were station games to break the ice and i got to know some really nice girls, so i was extremely relieved. (:
day 2 also saw all the j1 boys coming for complusory choir audition, to which i saw about 300 - 400 boys all of which were seemingly not interested to be there for auditions. still, there were some really good singers. we'll see what guys come in soon enough. today was the last day of AG, but i missed out on school thanks to me being sick again and my sore eye ): . 3 day mc and strict orders to stay in the house cause my sore eye thing is infectious.
nonetheless, i still had to go to school in the late afternoon to audition the other boys who didn't appear for the auditions yesterday. so there i was, with my slightly swollen red left eye, sitting in the choir room listening to boys sing scales and giving them marks based on their singing. after today, i think i know why the SLs looked like they were dying yesterday during the auditions. still, i managed to find a super in pitch guy who had a good tone and could play the guitar and piano. i hope he gets into choir.
next week i'll meet my new class. after meeting the girls in my AG i'm actually feelng quite positive about this whole new environment thing. it's a wonder what positive thinking can do to a person, so i shall really just try to remember all these positive thoughts. (:
okay, that aside, today was the last day of AG. tomorrow is a day off thanks to miss lai, or mainly because there is too many days for orientation and not enough activities to span through the days. well subject combi results came out today and i got into the combi that i wanted, so i guess that's good news.
ah, the new J1 batch is... interesting. hahaha. a variety of different people i would say. big and small, but really more small. the girls this year are mostly really quite pettie and so are about 1/2 the guys? well, compared to me that is. i realised that i'm actually taller than around 1/4 to 1/2 the guys in the cohort this year. oh goodness, there goes my hopes of blending in with them. lol.
so first day of AG was just pin drop slience, cause everyone was new to school and new to each other. i tried talking to a girl but got weird looks and an icy-cold attitude from her instead. so after 5 attempts to make friends with her, i kinda just gave up and was slightly down for the rest of the day... day 2 was better though cause there were station games to break the ice and i got to know some really nice girls, so i was extremely relieved. (:
day 2 also saw all the j1 boys coming for complusory choir audition, to which i saw about 300 - 400 boys all of which were seemingly not interested to be there for auditions. still, there were some really good singers. we'll see what guys come in soon enough. today was the last day of AG, but i missed out on school thanks to me being sick again and my sore eye ): . 3 day mc and strict orders to stay in the house cause my sore eye thing is infectious.
nonetheless, i still had to go to school in the late afternoon to audition the other boys who didn't appear for the auditions yesterday. so there i was, with my slightly swollen red left eye, sitting in the choir room listening to boys sing scales and giving them marks based on their singing. after today, i think i know why the SLs looked like they were dying yesterday during the auditions. still, i managed to find a super in pitch guy who had a good tone and could play the guitar and piano. i hope he gets into choir.
next week i'll meet my new class. after meeting the girls in my AG i'm actually feelng quite positive about this whole new environment thing. it's a wonder what positive thinking can do to a person, so i shall really just try to remember all these positive thoughts. (:
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)