lucky.

sometimes people wonder why can't they be like other people, and they wonder how come others are so lucky yet they themselves don't see it. i spoke to a friend who wishes the same thing, and he got me thinking: how often do we all say that? i wish i was like that..., i wish i was as lucky as him/her...., i wish, i wish.

i can't say that i've never had those thoughts. i wonder so often how things could be different if only i wasn't this way, if only it wasn't that way. but life is never that fair is it? unexpected things happen, obstacles will appear in your path, distractions will stop you. you get tripped over, fall flat. things don't always go the way you want. that's life.

yet there are those who seem to sail through all these in an effortless manner. they seem to have all the smarts, the right attitude, the right combination that pleases everyone around them. they may not be perfect, but what they have is good enough. and you find yourself thinking: i wish i was like that too.

this is why people say: the grass is greener on the other side.

i say:
the grass is greener on the other side, maybe because we are so busy looking at what other people have. so much to the extent that we sometimes forget what we ourselves have.

no one sails through life effortlessly. behind all the ease and effortless front there must have been unspeakable sacrifices and unspoken determination and efforts, right? nothing is ever easy; this is something we learn every day of our lives.

once in a while, i look back to see myself doubting the decisions that i make. wondering why i wasn't more of this or that. wondering why i wasn't in a different situation. i admit, those are nothing but foolish thoughts... there isn't a point in me wondering why i'm not perfect or somewhere near it like others around me seem to be.

there is no point cause we're all different, and we all have different paths to take in this lifetime. some might get on with life easy, others contented with what they have. then there will be those who will drive themselves hard and give their all to reach their goals.

i have yet to learn the true meaning of my life, because i'm still comparing in a negative way. i never seem to be enough for what i want to achieve cause i haven't understood what i need to do to help myself.

i'm lucky the way i am:
not naturally born smart, not perfect, not a smooth sailor in life, crazy, ridiculous, insensible at times.

i need to embrace that and all that i am. only then can i do what's best for me.