The little things.

6am bedtime

It's happening again; all the not being able to sleep, sleeping when the sun rises, the bad sleep and the anxiety waking in the middle of the night. Problem is I'm not so sure what's troubling me now. Life is okay, I am okay. So what is it? What's the reason for this feeling I'm having?

A little faint, but a hint of a rainbow I saw last friday. 

On the days when I feel like this, I can't help but look at the sky: at the white clouds, the endless blue hues and the light casting shadows. When the weather is good, sunlight feels warm on the skin and the breeze is cold ruffling through the trees. Days that remind me it's good to be alive, breathing. So I shouldn't worry, try not to worry, whatever it is that worries me. I don't know what it is, but it'll be alright no? It always is at the end of the day. 

"Live for the Little Things" they say. 

For the small moments that are insignificant now but may mean more when you look back years later. I think of that bus ride last Friday, of the pretty sky I saw, that hint of rainbow behind a cloud of golden light. I think of the person next to me then, how it was oddly comforting sitting in silence together that bus ride home, how it's always been that way for us. 

I think of how strangely at ease and happy I felt at that moment simply because the sky was pretty, the weather was good, the person next to me always makes me feel comforted in troubled times.

It really is about the little things isn't it? A day like that, a day that seems insignificant compared to others before, yet it's stuck in my mind. That feeling, that sky, that few hours. It's was contentment: quiet happiness over the simplest thing.

I am being weird hahahha. Might be my 1/4 life crisis, or my really really bad lack of sleep. Either ways I'm finally meeting Chris tomorrow, and Dawny is coming home. It's good to have my girls back with me now that the boys are all busy being men.