judgement day.

i found out today when i was in SGH that tomorrow is my judgement day.

my parents are finally back, so at least i'm not alone now and tomorrow we shall all have to go and hear what lies ahead for me. when anyone sees this, i most probably would have already known what the outcome is. the thing is, in my heart i most probably already do.

if it turns out to be what my gut feeling is telling me now, then i can only remember this:
there are always options.
no doubt about that, but i shall still remember this journey and all the feelings i have now for years to come. this is one thing time will not wash away. but it's okay. i think i need to remember all of this so that for the rest of my life i can walk on and find my own way.

i don't know if i'm scared, or if i'm worried. i just have this feeling in my stomach and in my heart that i cannot explain and it leaves me struggling to find the right words to tell anyone how i feel. i'll leave it as that.

what happens tomorrow is beyond me, but the rest of my life, i still have a say in it.

and so with that, i would like to give this advice to myself:
whatever it is, deal with it when it happens, one at a time.